Recovering from Spiritual Anorexia
Can I be honest with you? These last couple of years I have lived like a woman who has spiritual anorexia. The spiritual food was readily available but I refused its daily nourishment for my life. As an anorexic loses her ability to enjoy and find adequate nourishment in one of her most basic daily needs, so had I lost my ability to enjoy and receive spiritual nourishment from reading the Bible.
- Like an anorexic, the less intake I had in my Bible reading, the more I looked for fulfillment in other places.
- Like an anorexic, the less I partook in the feeding of my soul the more I began to feed my sin.
- Like an anorexic, I was in a depressed state and in my case did not even realize it.
- Like an anorexic, my perception of the reality of my state of being was skewed because of sin.
- Like an anorexic, the longer I lived this way the more this lifestyle became my new “normal”.
- Like an anorexic, the less nourishment I sought, the more I hid this truth from others.
- Like an anorexic, the longer I starved my soul the closer to death I came.
As the blinders have begun to lift and life is being restored to my soul, (through confession, repentance, and the grace of God) I have found a renewed desire for daily Bible reading. This is important, as the Bible is God’s main conduit for His people to know Him, be convicted of sin, and be encouraged to live with/for the hope we have in Jesus. If I truly believe this, then the Bible is the way I receive my daily spiritual bread; it is sustenance I can not live without.
The fact is, even when I am not desiring to read the Bible, reading is still what I need. The option I think I have, is really not an option at all if I choose life for my soul. I received encouragement in this truth from the following quote by J.C. Ryle that I found at Desiring God's website:
"Do not think you are getting no good from the Bible, merely because you do not see that good day by day. The greatest effects are by no means those which make the most noise, and are most easily observed.The greatest effects are often silent, quiet, and hard to detect at the time they are being produced.
Think of the influence of the moon upon the earth and of the air upon the human lungs. Remember how silently the dew falls, and how imperceptibly the grass grows. There may be far more doing than you think in your soul by your Bible-reading." (J.C. Ryle, Practical Religion, 136)What a refreshing perspective! May we daily "taste and see that the Lord is good." (Ps.34:8)